Women

I'm no expert.  I'm not sure anyone is.  If you've ever seen Back to the Future, there is one line in there that makes me chuckle more than any other.  I believe it's in Part II where Doc Brown is talking to Marty about his own future.  After achieving what most would be consider one of the pinnacles of science: Time travel, Doc goes on to this quote:  "Better that I devote myself to studying the other great mystery of the universe.... women."

I think most guys can relate to this sentiment.  Regardless of what relationships you've had the one thing we guys can not for the life of us figure out is what women want.  I believe the answer lies somewhere in between the extremes of simple attention and worship.  Although from woman to woman, I, along with 98% of the male population are clueless.  Here's a suggestion for all the women out there:  Make it obvious.  We can do the obvious.  If you expect us to read your mind, please shoot us. I've worked in an office dominated by women and here's what I have learned from personal experience.  Woman are caddy.  They do and say things to warrant attention mostly from other women.  If they can undermine another woman that they dislike, they will.  They won't think twice about it.  This may seem harsh as I'm sure there are exceptions, but this as a general rule stands.  If you think that is bad, and they turn their attentions toward us poor shlubs watch out.  The descriptor turns from caddy to down right vindictive.  I'll cite an example.  I was the sole man working with eleven women.  After a while, I just became like a door knob.  I was there, but it's just "Bryan".  The things I heard would make even the most manly man curl into a fetal position.  Here is the scenario.  One of the women had broken up with a long standing boyfriend.  The other girls trying to cheer her up decide that the best medicine would be to dress in their most slutty outfits and go to the boyfriend's favorite bar and wiggle and giggle everything in front of this poor sap to (and yes this is a verbatim quote) "show him what he was missing."  These woman were far from ugly.  But to even think something like this up as a means to get back at the ex, is well vindictive. That said women can be the most caring, sensitive, well-meaning, loving, kind and absolute awesome people on the planet.  If they care about you, they will go out of their way to nurture you and make you feel like the most important person on the planet.  Add this to the paragraph above and you have the second greatest mystery on the planet. There's really only two things men want from women.  The first of course is sex.  Men love sex.  We crave it.  We desire it.  We think about it at least half of our waking hours.  If you ask, we will deny this, but we are lying to you.  We do think about it -- yes, that often.  The second is that we want women to at least pretend that we are in charge.  Follow our leads and smooth out the bumps along the way.  Whatever decisions we (that would be man and woman) make, the man always feels that the success or failure of that decision -- even if it was made jointly -- falls directly back on our shoulders.  This is similar to the feeling that women get when company stops by and the house is a mess.  The woman always feels like it's a reflection on her, not her husband, not her kids, not the dog, her.   Give us these two things and we'll put up with mood swings, chewing out, arguments, bad hair days, and even the occasional slap for being "insensitive". Please ladies, give us obvious.