Elections and Election Advertising

How stupid do they think we are?  Obviously, pretty stupid.  The sad thing is they are probably right.  Our attention spans are about three nanoseconds long, and I think they're getting shorter.  Let's go through the plethora of ways that politicians try to persuade us to vote for them.

• Election signs.  Out there by the thousands, they are simply there to plaster names into the public's brain.  Of all the forms of political nonsensical ads, these have to be the worst.  The signs go deep down to the very core of what is wrong with our elections.  It's all about name recognition and association with party.  Issues?  Nope.  Stances?  Nope.  Just a nice gal/guy?  Nope.  Not even that.  Just blatant lowest common denominator of mundane stupidity.  Vote for Smith.  He's a Democrat/Republican.  We should be insulted, if it didn't work so well.
• TV ads.  You might get a little stance on an issue here or there, but by-in-large these are attack ads mixed with some guy dressed in jeans (probably the first pair he's worn in his life!) looking at a group of bobbleheads, mouthing some inane utterances, while smiling and trying to look judicious.  In reality, the people standing around are likely part of his election team.  TV ads also have the distinction of splice tactics.  They continuously take things out of context and have some ominous voice-over with scary music in the background.  "This guy kills babies.  That's right babies!!!  We must ask, Mr. Voter, could puppies be far behind?"  I extract very little useful information from these things.  Please, if you can't research go against the most negative ads out there.  Unless the candidate's name is Jeffrey Dahmer, please vote against them.
• Websites.  This is where I do my research.  I actually (gulp) match the person's experience and accomplishments to the job they are taking.  While I don't always glean the most useful information from the actual candidate's websites (I try to find more independent ones), at least they have useful stuff there and a list of accomplishments.  I actually recommend going to their sites and reading an issue that they might be involved in and make an informed choice.  Unfortunately for every informed voter, there's about six that read the roadside election signs.  "Yup!  He's a Republikkkan.  I'll vote fer 'im."  Sorry.  That's the best Goofy impression I can do.
• Emails.  Of all the propoganda machines, this form of political advertising takes the proverbial cake.  I've have never read such nonsense and skewed information than from these.  Mr. X is the greatest candidate ever, or Mr. Y is a communist sympathizer and wants to put nuclear weapons in all daycares.  Countless times I've debunked whatever garbage these spew at the fact checking websites.  At least you get somewhat of a truth-o-meter reading.

Elections have devolved into political muckrakery that pales in substance or even resembles the diplomacy seen from the days of the whistle stop political speeches of yesteryear.  At least you could go see a candidate and understand his stand on issue Z.  Now, you'll be lucky to find solid information on issue Z, and any straightforward answers.

Once the election is over and the votes have been counted, recounted, and all chads are left to dangle, hang, or become pregnant there should be a three day free-for-all in destroying political signs and billboards.  Get out the shotgun and relieve some stress.  Have a bonfire around the billboard.  Roast marshmallows.  Have a rip the wins/losers' signs in half on the steps to the courthouse.  Then, have the winner sweep up with a broom.  After all, he will then be a public servant.  It's the least they could do.